A mental health breakthrough, negative self-talk part 1

Along with the new site I announced last week I have some new exciting work to tell you about, a breakthrough in mental health.

In my mind, people fall into 2 major categories, which may well be one of the missing fundamentals when it comes to stable mental health.
1. People with chatty brains self-talk in a negative way, constantly undermining themselves, saying “you are rubbish”, “no-one loves you”, “you will never achieve anything” “you are fat, and unappealing”. You get the picture. These people also have trouble sleeping as the day’s hiccups play over and over again in their heads.

These are the people with anxiety, depression and a whole host of mental and emotional issues. This also happens to people who are in poor physical health. Even a minor illness or heartbreak etc creates chatter. Addicts also fall within this category. They have a little nagging voice saying “drink me”, “eat me”, “buy me”, “just one more bet” etc. This is why you are said to “always be an addict”. If you have one little bit of the stimulant, you want more and more and more. The voice and thus the compulsion gets louder and louder. Phobias too. We know that it’s irrational to be scared of spiders. In the UK, at least, they are non-deadly and small. It’s impossible to stop the fearful thoughts though.

2. People with quiet heads, their thoughts are more practically based and calm. They think about what needs doing. It doesn’t sound like Grand Central Station in there. They can get to sleep easily. These people are generally at peace within themselves and happy. Emotionally stable, and well.
If you have never considered this before, it may seem quite strange that the other people exist. You may struggle to comprehend the other as it’s so foreign. Humans tend to assume the way they experience ‘reality’ is the same as others do.

I assure you it’s true. Ask around.

I used to be in the first camp. My monkey brain was in constant chatter, some of it negative and some of it just murmuring. Non-stop conversations about nothing in particular. I was living in a souk! Whilst revising for my A-levels I could quite easily listen to rock music. I could block that out along with the babble. I now need to write and think in silence. The slightest noise distracts me as I’m living in internal silence. I need to pause movies to send important text messages or emails. I can’t multi-task anymore. I find multi-tasking a bit silly anyway as you can’t fully be present in multiple tasks simultaneously so whatever you do is half-assed. That’s what happens in my case anyway.

As my healing abilities began to awaken more than a decade ago, my internal monologue suddenly, and out of nowhere, shut down. It went from rush hour at Grand Central Station, to eerily quiet, you could almost see the tumble-weed. On hearing this, many people have been excited for me, wishing they could have such a quiet head , but it had a downside. I had zero thoughts in my head, zero. Basic things like crossing the road where we internally say look left and right, I couldn’t even say. I had to mutter them out loud as quietly as possible to avoid looking completely barmy. Head-phones helped as people are always on their phones via headphones.

I read in a convoluted way. I add an extra step. When I read, I actually read the words in my head so I engage visual as well as auditory senses. Fast readers don’t hear the words in their head. They simply see the words and they are assimilated into their brains. So, when my brain went quiet, I couldn’t read internally. Out loud was fine, thankfully. When I read in my head, there was a bolt of energy starting in my coccyx that would shoot up my spine and explode rather unpleasantly in my brain like an electrical shock. This went on for months until my brain and thoughts gradually and slowly came back on-line, without the chatter of course. The only chatter I have is when I obsess about something. Formerly men have been the major source of this, but that is stable now. If someone royally upsets me, that broken record can sometimes play on repeat. The same happens when we are sick. There is a bunch of negative self-talk. Have you noticed that yourself? When you are poorly, with even just a cold, your thoughts are all doom and gloom. The old poor me pity party.

Darn it, I have a lot more to say on this and how I’ve cracked it. I do want to keep these blogs bite size. I think I shall pick this up again next week.

I have an exercise for you. Please notice if you have a naturally quiet or chatty brain. Then pay attention to mishaps. Even stubbing your toe or if you are sick, is there a lot of negative self-talk? I’ll explain what it is next week.

Have an amazing week!


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